I would really appreciate a copy of that glossy teen magazine.
It should be about 4-5 years old by now.
It might have been Seventeen or something a little more risque like Female.
Malaysian edition please.

---
The magazine in question contains a quiz attempting to predict the type of guy you fall for. Over and over again (it was implied). And the bossy article proceeds to divide the (attractive portion of the) male species into 3 groups. And as a nice visual, each group had a hollywood embodiment.

Specimen 1*:
Attributes:


-Mysterious
-Adventurous
-Raw
-Found wherever adrenaline rushes and danger lurks








Specimen 2*:
Attributes:
- Shy
-Sweet
- Loyal
-Found in the library or other nice, quiet spots
- Up for museum trips, art galleries and other things you love to do






Specimen 3*:
Attributes:
-babe magnet
-popular (so true- impossible to find a decent picture of Freddie Prince Jr as “Fred” that was not a group shot!)
-usually found at the most vogue hangout spot flanked by hordes of female fans
-out of your league :P

To my friend Hui Jing's dismay, the quiz dumped Specimen 2 onto her lap. (I did not see her problem)
Yi Bin, the owner of the magazine, snagged Specimen 1. Steph and I wound up on opposite edges. She barely qualified for Specimen 2, one point less and she would've landed Specimen 1.
I almost bypassed Spidey- being one point away from Specimen 3. Yes, the borderline score I got, technically, dictated that I stick with Specimen 2, but I'm pretty sure if I had taken the quiz more honestly I would've gotten Specimen 3. So with that in mind---

My present headache is that this quiz to date, has been ridiculously relevant for something I believe was contrived by writers who pander to the superficial, sparkly whimsies of yours truly.

I have consistently fallen for Specimen 3 with traces of Specimen 2 attributes. I am most predictable :(

The one I am currently pining after, for instance, was most recently (and candidly) added to the ranks of "The most eligible bachelor in [insert name of nondescript suburb here]"

I shall proceed to cradle my head in one of my hands. I hold my other hand out for the magazine.


Footnote:
1* For any kind reader who actually has understood any inkling of this article- the magazine does not refer to the groups as "specimens." But I cannot seem to recall the exact categories . . .

Labels: Who am I to tinker with the natural order